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Two years ago, I used to be depressed. Business was bad, the country was at war, and I had no idea how to support myself and my team. Instead of complaining, I made a decision to work on myself: I went to therapy, consulted a coach, and read self-help books.
I noticed that the survival of my startup depended 100% on me, so I began working on conscious leadership.
My startup didn’t just survive—it thrived. We launched latest products, got great metrics, and got investments.
Founders, don’t rush to hand over, fire your team, or shut down your startup. Start by working on yourself. Here are three traits of a mindful leader that can enable you navigate through turbulence.
1. Recognize Destructive Patterns and Change the Script
If you were a star student in highschool and your loved ones praised you for your good grades, you almost certainly developed a certain pattern: “I have to be the best to be loved.” This happened to me, too.
During brainstorming sessions, I discovered myself increasingly anxious and defensive when my ideas weren’t immediately recognized as the best. Criticism, regardless of how constructive, was perceived as a personal attack. This definitely affected business results—discussions dragged on for hours, I wasted a lot of energy on conflict, and the team thought I used to be toxic.
After reading Young and Klosko’s book Reinventing Your Life, I discovered this pattern and understood how to change it. Now I don’t feel uncomfortable when someone criticizes me. I’ve adopted a latest approach: I speak last in discussions. By letting my team speak first, I can listen fastidiously and objectively evaluate the merits of each idea.
Here’s one other habit to be careful for: Are you usually afraid your team will leave you? If you’re continuously apprehensive about this, it’s possible you’ll have something called “anxious attachment.” If you don’t change it, your team may leave—not because they were going to anyway, but because they got uninterested in you being suspicious all the time.
2. Separate yourself from your ego
Your ego is like a voice that thinks it knows best. It can trick you into believing things that are not true, like that you just’re a terrible person if you are not continuously praised.
How it plays out at work: Imagine you’re interviewing someone who’s more intelligent than you in some areas. If your ego is in control, you would possibly see that person as a threat fairly than acknowledge their priceless knowledge. That can lead to poor decisions.
Your ego also affects how you’re feeling. If your online business performance drops, your ego may make you think you are a failure, but others may see it as an opportunity to improve.
I discovered what ego is when I used to be depressed and tried different practices like ice baths. My rational mind knew it was good for me, but one other voice kept saying, “Don’t do it, stay in bed, it’s safer.” I learned that it was my ego talking. My job was not to let that voice win.
Wondering how much your ego controls you? Read Eckhart Tolle’s book A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose. It helped me understand the concept of ego.
Sometimes ego can do terrible things to founders and even lead to the downfall of a business. I know a founder who was all the time comparing himself to other corporations because of his huge ego. He began breaking rules just to be first, as an alternative of focusing on making a real impact and building a sustainable business.
3. Discover your inner driver
No matter what you do or what business decisions you make, psychology explains it with two kinds of drivers. The first is the pleasure drive, where you do something for the reward or recognition. The second is the aggression drive, where you wish to challenge others, be first, or succeed at the expense of others.
However, there is a third factor that defines an influential leader. This is the generative drive. People with it are curious and all the time want to develop and improve things around them.
For me, a great example of a generative leader is Satya Nadella (CEO of Microsoft). He encourages Microsoft to invest in projects that might not be immediately profitable but have a significant impact on education and medicine. Or Jensen Huang (CEO of NVIDIA): He is humble and focused on making a difference. He talks about his employees and how their work, corresponding to creating chips for key technologies, is contributing to the progress of the world.
When you understand what truly drives you, especially if it is generative motivation, you’ll be able to run your online business in a way that is not only about profit, but has a positive impact on the world.
Nothing helps you analyze your actions higher than external feedback. Surround yourself with honest people and experts. Communicate with them. And be honest with yourself about what drives you internally.