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“You’re stupid?”
These words are harsh, even to look at them. I never imagined I’d say that to a member of my team.
However, when I set out to write this text and asked everyone in my company to talk about workplace trauma, their experiences included the following: CEOs calling people silly in a meeting; managers explode in rage over minor mistakes or lie about promotions; you’re feeling stressed and shouted at every day. Fifteen percent of my employees were willing to share their stories. Some of them were hard to imagine.
What was most surprising was how common workplace trauma is. Not the big “T” trauma that results from dangerous or criminal behavior, but slightly the “little T” trauma that also causes serious harm but results from poor leadership. A toxic work environment makes people feel unworthy, incompetent and unhappy, which reduces their potential contribution to the company. While working through trauma during the transition from one job to one other requires individual responsibility, leaders and managers can and ought to be willing to help them heal.
Horror movies
Trust is easy to lose and hard to gain, but a history of toxic leaders can make the situation even worse. In every traumatic workplace, my employees have heard the same messages: “We are transparent,” “family,” and “We trust you to do your job.” Then the inconsistencies began. One described a former manager who spread negative rumors and was overly critical of even the smallest mistakes as suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). One of them called his particularly condescending former manager a “non-violent psychopath.”
Even after leaving a toxic company, employees risk carrying the trauma to their next workplace. They may read articles about spotting a healthy culture or even join a recent team filled with hope, but if signs of toxic behavior appear, they quickly lose that optimism. Many people are left feeling trapped without options or economic stability, but the more time they spend in this toxic work environment, the deeper the fear and uncertainty it instills. Without healing, people carry this trauma with them, reducing the potential value they’ll bring or desire to bring to any future company.
The influence of leaders
Leadership behavior sets the tone for the entire organization. In my 30-year profession, I have never shouted because it might be inconsistent with my belief that mistakes are opportunities for growth and continuous improvement. When words and actions are inconsistent, a traumatized worker will more quickly lose all trust in the company’s leadership.
While the vision and actions of senior management provide the foundation for a supportive work culture, the best impact comes from the day-to-day experiences with direct management and colleagues. As CEO, I can equip managers with the tools they need to build trusting relationships and empower them to support the recovery process, which is why we have hired someone to incorporate the knowledge and skills of our best managers into the training program. By training them to communicate effectively, recognize trauma, and create an emotionally protected environment, leaders can help managers mitigate the effects of past trauma on the remainder of the workplace.
Rebuild with consistency
To rebuild trust after a traumatic experience, consistency is key. Leaders and managers must not only talk about emotional intelligence and the company’s living values - they need to visibly and consistently show actions that match these words over time. One team member noted how surprised he was that the CEO emailed him acknowledging his efforts just a few days after joining the team, but much more so that every leadership experience he had had so far aligned with this behavior.
Start working on rebuilding trust from day one. One person commented on the authenticity and transparency they felt during their first conversation with the CEO, and how this continues after almost 4 years of working with us. Most of my employees remember the smaller, on a regular basis events that had the biggest impact – support emails, free movie tickets, and the flexibility to respond to last-minute emergencies. They also mentioned team-bonding opportunities over non-work-related topics, similar to a trip to Vegas and a book club, as helpful in releasing trauma by calming fears that co-workers might cause similar problems.
Plan, evaluate and improve
There is no magical way to heal people from existing trauma, but regular check-ups are the best way to help. Talking about toxic experiences may be uncomfortable, but one-on-one managers find it easier to draw out, discover, and help resolve specific workplace issues. Create a standardized process to ensure consistent experiences and leverage technology platforms to facilitate planning and clear communication.
HR may be precious in supporting these checks: gathering worker feedback, helping managers, or participating yourself. When we hired an HR leader, she took over regular one-on-one interviews, and her open-ended questions proved extremely effective in uncovering past trauma in the workplace. Her ability to make people feel comfortable garnered precious feedback, which built stronger relationships and brought great advantages to the company.
When check-in is successful, recognize and reward the efforts behind that success. One worker described the profound impact of a easy “thank you” on his confidence in leadership and organizational commitment. By setting examples and sharing stories of successful check-ins, leaders create an environment that supports manager-employee interactions.
Our positive results
At a social event in February, we invited everyone to send Valentine’s Day cards to their colleagues expressing how special it was to work together. The next day we received the messages others had sent us and a second wave of positive feelings. People then took to social media and deepened their experience: “It’s amazing to wake up and read all the love from our Influence Mobile family. Thank you for creating such a pleasant and positive workplace environment.” That single spark of positivity became contagious.
No one can heal one other person’s trauma, but there is much that leaders can do to facilitate their healing journey. By fostering a culture of consistency and support between employees, managers and co-workers, we are able to build a work environment where people overcome work-related trauma.